[Fallen world]
I've had one hell a day yesterday that's for sure, I had found the Rev in order for me to exact some vengence. Things didn't go as planned at all, the mutated thing that he is had skills I was unaware of. Sure I've seen him melt in to fridges and walls, but I had no idea he could try to fuse with living things. That's what happened. Soon as I was going to wrench an arm off he became an oozing mass, that wriggled its way in to my host's body. Once inside he explode some of my organs, not massively important ones but they had their own things that are dangerous for the body when let out. I used fire to cover my body to burn him out, he came out of my back causing several holes that bled profously.
Unlike some of my kin I don't leave the host until its dead, it takes me forever to change back as I got to get the legs fixed. Sadly the more I shift and break the bones the more calcium builds up around the bones, by that time the host would be unable to walk and it would be time to get a new one. I'm always loathe to leave a host it provides me with a shell, along with an anchor that usually keeps my mind somewhat stable. The Rev and I ended up badly hurt me from my internals and holes, him from the fact he was so badly burnt. That didn't stop us we were going to carry on fighting til one of us gave up, I won the battle by impaling him on earth spikes but not before he got an axe in to my neck. Just about as I was going to finish him off for good, some people showed up to stop me and began to protect him.
One of them was a cloud or mist I can't remember but I think she was the nun, I seen that same form in the library in the haze of red I saw for days because of the red light. There was a winged woman proberly an angel, and some pink haired chick I remember calling a tadpole. The mist threatened to sufficate me, I threw myself off the edge of the building I'd been fighting on. That's when Annika found me with the mist woman standing over me going to make good on her threat, don't worry grey cloud I'll remember you and then you're going to get it. Annika had scared the woman away thank fuck for that, then I saw Uri was with her that arrogant, fucking bastard. Was not up for his crap today at all... And yes I'm a badass but you try being in a host body with EXPLODED ORGANS!!! I guess he knew how badly I was fucked up on the inside due to that because he stopped making snide remarks, Annika told him to start healing me but all he could manage was to scab me over and stop the internal bleeding via holding my stuff together.
I mean okay we've been butting heads for a while now showing eachother we can both be mind fucked, the fact is if I really wanted to I could unleash half the city on him and be done with it all. Why go to all that effort for just one demon? He gave up what he could to keep my host going, Annika finished it off telling me I would be sore for a few days so no shifting or fighting... She's right about that my body aches but its the ache I can live with at least, then she drops a bomb on Uri and I telling us we got to work together. Work together?! Okay I mean I know she wants to capture a couple of people, but seriously work with that arsehole? He doesn't even want my help or my contacts, he thinks I'm just some ingrate that he can kick around like a football. Well fine if he comes BEGGING for my help I might give it to him, I don't have much of a choice really I owe them both and Annika is an elder Fury...
I really hate my life.
Lulz of the day:
[17:12] Roan Lighthouse shouts: I don't think you understand... THAT GIRL RUINED SOME OF MY INTERIOR WITH HER VAGINA!
Monday, 11 June 2012
Sunday, 10 June 2012
Lost, found, alone
[The Fallen world]
Down there, down there its terrible. I'm surrounded by four walls with no way out, its dark there's no light, there's no sound, no contact from others who had been thrown down from heaven. I was alone. I remember screaming, throwing myself against the walls, clawing at the surfaces with nails that had become claws. All the while I screamed as I tried to get out. How long did I rage at being captive? How many days, weeks, years, centuries? I'm considered a danger to everyone because I been made psychotic, suppose they were right as I injured myself frequently on the unforgiving walls. Strange how one loses all sense of time, and in it has a complete loss of sanity once and for all. A gibbering wreck wanting blood, alone in the dark surrounded by four walls.
I forgot myself, I forgot heaven, I forgot my name.
My purpose however remained.
Chaos, blood shed, pride...
And then... Everything cracked open, I crawled out to the surface world. A place ripe with sin, emotion and order I wanted to smash.
Many things have happened since I got out of Hell. My first host was a lovely creature, she was not easily subdued however and I merely slumbered. I think she knew she was no longer alone in her own body, but acted normally despite my presence at the back of her mind. I needed time to gain strength from my long imprisonment on my own, while she wandered around I slept, gained information, I grew. I was happy to be free. However she ended up being smacked upside the head with a hammer carried by a red headed woman, that was when I was able to wake up to take over the body to shift it to my form crafted by my time in the cell. Safe to say that woman hadn't expected to be attacked by one such as myself, though still weakened I managed to put up a good enough fight. A house is now minus one window.
Over the course of my time on the surface I have gotten in to trouble which, is a most delicious thing to do. I have found I like to eat pride, pride links with wrath when wounded, and someone who prides their appearence often makes lust. I hate lust. I had been on my own trying to find others who were like me, not the angels for though we were once kin they are now hated. Like how human families always have one disgusting uncle, they exile him from their presence. That is what it is like with the angels, those twats who stayed in heaven to blindly follow God. Fights were a common thing, I was chasing a man who resemembled a beast known as a pig a thing domesticated by humans. I was shot by some interfering woman who I then attacked til she misted, insane at the time I didn't bother to question it so intense was the need to hurt something.
I also tangled with two groups of angels at two seperate occasions, the last encounter ended up with the loss of my host. I was forced to flee it to find another for me to take over, lest I go back to the depths from where I came from. Oh there was this amazing demoness called Sasha I forget her full name, but she invited me to visit Veritas where the demons live! In the porn shop used to be Crio but she's gone now, I miss Crio I also miss Berith or Pieter that I met. He helped me out after I got chocolate in my hair, because for some reason I thought a chocolate teapot would make a great hat. We all hung out together to do all sorts of crap, it was fun but they're gone now and Pieter is in some other faction. I think he ate the demon that was in him, Missy wouldn't explain it.
Missy is a lust demoness she likes to get all hot and bothered, when ever she's getting naughty I don't want to be around. Her lust is forcefed to me that makes me horny, I have no wish to go copulate with some poor sap. That's what tails are for. Mephis and Oriax are a couple they both have their amusing qualities, in order to keep up to date with news I got my self employed in to their services. Aegis Security what a perfect job! Oriax is occasionally annoying he keeps trying to convince me to do dirty things with him in alleyways, recently he's taken to try leaping on to my back after the stones incident. He's... "Special". Mephis is the more sane of the two but I have noticed he can go a bit nuts as well, I've grown on that demon like a cancerous growth but Mephis is a good friend. Anyway I'm going off track I think. There was this other demon called... I will recall his name when I see him but he always appears to be haggard, as if his host can't cope with whatever demon resides in there. He must be of immense power to make that happen, or just incompetant and can't take over. I like Annika, Pi, Cember, Missy and Sam... Though Sam has moments of where I feel he's a complete ass, but otherwise he looks after the family. Kaze aka The Advocator was the one who suggested I become a Fury, in that role I have done a lot that has been appreciated. Kaze has gone now so has Sasha, I heard the angels dismembered her. Butcher was also lost to the angels despite the amount of information I gathered to try and orginise his rescue, we're broken now not as united as we used to be. That will change we will become whole again soon.
I missed something... Oh the shelter where Adin, Elijah and Bastian are. Adin is an angel he's Elijah's lover, Elijah is a demon maybe that's why Adin acts part demon. Unusual for an angel but that is proberly why I like the pair of them, Bastian however is an enigma though he's a clergy man of sorts he's in to romance novels and used to be dead. Ugh those two though soon as Adin gets frisky he doesn't care who's watching, he's all over Elijah and the demon lets it happen. Proberly for shits and giggles... They hump more than rabbits do!
My web over the city has been sprung and I'm still working on it, when my madness allows me to be sane I can get a lot done. How do I know I'm even insane? I have gained relations/contacts within the House of Kallium, I'm rather fond of Zekk the vampire prince. He's creepy I like that and he has sharp, pointy things that can cut people. I've seen his wrath, tasted it but we work for eachother for mutual benefit, I do tasks for him and in return I can have favours or gain information that is much needed for the demons. Though I believe he tricked me last night. I'd been invited to see something that would make me happy, the general talk when it began was to lure in The Retriever that grabs marked souls. I think Pi and I had gleaned that once there they would then lure in angels to rescue the captives the vampires had, then the spiked demon would eat them all for the benefit of a good show. However I been asked to make illusions to hide the mass of people from sight except Cassandra, I did as I was asked because I wanted to see the angels suffer. Once Retriever had shown up the command to subdue the beast was cracked out, at this point I was too drained to be angry over the trick at all. I never got to see the angels suffering I passed out, I just hope that when Pi reported back she skipped over the illusion part.
I was tricked...
Two can play that game!
Lulz of the day:
[16:35] Blueray Darkes: [just say when I can post in :D]
[16:36] Father Sebastian: ((NOW. We need more Blueray.))
Down there, down there its terrible. I'm surrounded by four walls with no way out, its dark there's no light, there's no sound, no contact from others who had been thrown down from heaven. I was alone. I remember screaming, throwing myself against the walls, clawing at the surfaces with nails that had become claws. All the while I screamed as I tried to get out. How long did I rage at being captive? How many days, weeks, years, centuries? I'm considered a danger to everyone because I been made psychotic, suppose they were right as I injured myself frequently on the unforgiving walls. Strange how one loses all sense of time, and in it has a complete loss of sanity once and for all. A gibbering wreck wanting blood, alone in the dark surrounded by four walls.
I forgot myself, I forgot heaven, I forgot my name.
My purpose however remained.
Chaos, blood shed, pride...
And then... Everything cracked open, I crawled out to the surface world. A place ripe with sin, emotion and order I wanted to smash.
Many things have happened since I got out of Hell. My first host was a lovely creature, she was not easily subdued however and I merely slumbered. I think she knew she was no longer alone in her own body, but acted normally despite my presence at the back of her mind. I needed time to gain strength from my long imprisonment on my own, while she wandered around I slept, gained information, I grew. I was happy to be free. However she ended up being smacked upside the head with a hammer carried by a red headed woman, that was when I was able to wake up to take over the body to shift it to my form crafted by my time in the cell. Safe to say that woman hadn't expected to be attacked by one such as myself, though still weakened I managed to put up a good enough fight. A house is now minus one window.
Over the course of my time on the surface I have gotten in to trouble which, is a most delicious thing to do. I have found I like to eat pride, pride links with wrath when wounded, and someone who prides their appearence often makes lust. I hate lust. I had been on my own trying to find others who were like me, not the angels for though we were once kin they are now hated. Like how human families always have one disgusting uncle, they exile him from their presence. That is what it is like with the angels, those twats who stayed in heaven to blindly follow God. Fights were a common thing, I was chasing a man who resemembled a beast known as a pig a thing domesticated by humans. I was shot by some interfering woman who I then attacked til she misted, insane at the time I didn't bother to question it so intense was the need to hurt something.
I also tangled with two groups of angels at two seperate occasions, the last encounter ended up with the loss of my host. I was forced to flee it to find another for me to take over, lest I go back to the depths from where I came from. Oh there was this amazing demoness called Sasha I forget her full name, but she invited me to visit Veritas where the demons live! In the porn shop used to be Crio but she's gone now, I miss Crio I also miss Berith or Pieter that I met. He helped me out after I got chocolate in my hair, because for some reason I thought a chocolate teapot would make a great hat. We all hung out together to do all sorts of crap, it was fun but they're gone now and Pieter is in some other faction. I think he ate the demon that was in him, Missy wouldn't explain it.
Missy is a lust demoness she likes to get all hot and bothered, when ever she's getting naughty I don't want to be around. Her lust is forcefed to me that makes me horny, I have no wish to go copulate with some poor sap. That's what tails are for. Mephis and Oriax are a couple they both have their amusing qualities, in order to keep up to date with news I got my self employed in to their services. Aegis Security what a perfect job! Oriax is occasionally annoying he keeps trying to convince me to do dirty things with him in alleyways, recently he's taken to try leaping on to my back after the stones incident. He's... "Special". Mephis is the more sane of the two but I have noticed he can go a bit nuts as well, I've grown on that demon like a cancerous growth but Mephis is a good friend. Anyway I'm going off track I think. There was this other demon called... I will recall his name when I see him but he always appears to be haggard, as if his host can't cope with whatever demon resides in there. He must be of immense power to make that happen, or just incompetant and can't take over. I like Annika, Pi, Cember, Missy and Sam... Though Sam has moments of where I feel he's a complete ass, but otherwise he looks after the family. Kaze aka The Advocator was the one who suggested I become a Fury, in that role I have done a lot that has been appreciated. Kaze has gone now so has Sasha, I heard the angels dismembered her. Butcher was also lost to the angels despite the amount of information I gathered to try and orginise his rescue, we're broken now not as united as we used to be. That will change we will become whole again soon.
I missed something... Oh the shelter where Adin, Elijah and Bastian are. Adin is an angel he's Elijah's lover, Elijah is a demon maybe that's why Adin acts part demon. Unusual for an angel but that is proberly why I like the pair of them, Bastian however is an enigma though he's a clergy man of sorts he's in to romance novels and used to be dead. Ugh those two though soon as Adin gets frisky he doesn't care who's watching, he's all over Elijah and the demon lets it happen. Proberly for shits and giggles... They hump more than rabbits do!
My web over the city has been sprung and I'm still working on it, when my madness allows me to be sane I can get a lot done. How do I know I'm even insane? I have gained relations/contacts within the House of Kallium, I'm rather fond of Zekk the vampire prince. He's creepy I like that and he has sharp, pointy things that can cut people. I've seen his wrath, tasted it but we work for eachother for mutual benefit, I do tasks for him and in return I can have favours or gain information that is much needed for the demons. Though I believe he tricked me last night. I'd been invited to see something that would make me happy, the general talk when it began was to lure in The Retriever that grabs marked souls. I think Pi and I had gleaned that once there they would then lure in angels to rescue the captives the vampires had, then the spiked demon would eat them all for the benefit of a good show. However I been asked to make illusions to hide the mass of people from sight except Cassandra, I did as I was asked because I wanted to see the angels suffer. Once Retriever had shown up the command to subdue the beast was cracked out, at this point I was too drained to be angry over the trick at all. I never got to see the angels suffering I passed out, I just hope that when Pi reported back she skipped over the illusion part.
I was tricked...
Two can play that game!
Lulz of the day:
[16:35] Blueray Darkes: [just say when I can post in :D]
[16:36] Father Sebastian: ((NOW. We need more Blueray.))
Thursday, 17 May 2012
OOC post cos I have nothing better to update with
http://ruthbell28.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/gallstones.html
Saturday, 10 March 2012
Back to glory and catch up
(Toxian Timeline - Convergence of both time-lines, Risen virus goes dormant when in Toxia)
I haven't written anything in a while not because I had no time but because I've been lazy, I suppose I should alight upon what's happened in the past month or so. Magpie who I have now dubbed as traitor who turned me angel, is still to have the shock of his lifetime since I'm now back to how I'm meant to be. Fate is a fickle bitch and the fact I have two prophecies surrounding me doesn't help, I've also never been told these prophecies at all so I don't give a fuck.
Full moon is out that means the wolves are all being whores with each other or who they can find, long as they stay the fuck away from me I have no need to sneer at their own disgrace. Animals fucking animals that haven't learned to go above their own instincts, yeah just cos you turn in to a wolf doesn't mean you lack that human part of you. Anyway I'm off the subject so full moon and I been slinking about the shit-hole island again, I often find the pang for old friends is what drives me to the place for I wouldn't return otherwise. I met up with Savannah and Dracon, it looked like Sav was already severely hurt.
Dracon took us to the Pit to perform the ritual to make me a demon again, I was curious and afraid at the same time. He called up what appeared to be a type of Hellish dragon, then I recalled Dracon himself was intertwined with Leviathan. In that respect its no wonder I took a great liking to the demon as we both shared draconic traits in some fashion, and it wasn't til after the event I learned Dracon had taken on physical attributes of a dragon just as I do. I remember being told my angelic body would be eaten when my heart was removed, my heart is a most precious thing it has survived at least three body transplantations already. It holds my essence or did before I was turned angel, it was after I was gone from the realm the angel part of me died altogether...
I woke up in Hell chained to a wall left to starve, left alone except when Lucifer's minions came in to offer me pain. Pain here is a terrible thing for it neither satifies or causes pleasure, it is intense causing terrible agony. The same with sex though I craved it only as a last resort, I was copulated with several times to the satisfaction of his imps and not my own. Instead it left me empty, humiliated and more alone than ever. I've been down here for months suffering at my uncle's whims as punishment for stealing from him, I'm Blueray's essence while she is on the surface being an angel I'm separated from her. We were re-united when she died, our agony increased ten fold at that moment. My head sagged against my chest all hope of getting out of here gone, now whole once more I shared my pain with the part of me that had been missing.
A voice called out my name that was familiar to me on many levels, I lifted my head and the chains that bound me fell away. I was free... The voice kept on calling me so I followed it more out of curiosity than anything else, I also wanted to get away from Lucifer that terrifying uncle Janvier told me never to see. From the depths of despair I flew out of the Hell mouth itself, taking on the form of a large black dragon that dove to my heart vessel. It took me all in every drop of me then I was replaced in to a new, blank body. A body that I took over without having to fight for it and Dendra was still with me also, a body that I moulded in to my liking with my features. A brand new body, hello born again virgin... Really need to stop doing that!
Course it was after I had settled that we began upon making Sav a demon too, she protested but had little strength to do so. Dracon made a bargain with the Kali as I perceived to be one of the many names Death itself took, for Kali is a Goddess of Death and sex and is Death not one of the greatest deities that abound? Is not sex the best pleasure on Earth? Sex and death are closely related. Death and I have a strange relationship after it took me over, Lorne may have "vanquished" it and removed it from me but Death is never vanquished. The deal was struck Dracon gave Sav part of his heart that whole gesture seemed far too familar to me, then he asked me to feed her my blood which I done. I left soon after the change had been done, didn't want to see the two get in to a fight.
A short time after my initial change I returned to see the two, I asked Dracon to return my dragon headed hammer to me also known as Shadowblade. Once I had it back in my grip I did a few moves with it, it was like the weapon had never left my hand and the runes glowed brightly on the handle. We then made our way to the church, found us some angels to harress. Course one of them seems to think its a good idea to keep laughing at me, so I half crushed her under the ground leaving her shaking in her boots. The other angel got a lucky blind shot off at me, I was already sinking in to my shadow and past caring.
Savannah's side of events
Lulz of the day:
Jules: No no you're right, you're not a pervert. You're a provert, you're really good at it!
I haven't written anything in a while not because I had no time but because I've been lazy, I suppose I should alight upon what's happened in the past month or so. Magpie who I have now dubbed as traitor who turned me angel, is still to have the shock of his lifetime since I'm now back to how I'm meant to be. Fate is a fickle bitch and the fact I have two prophecies surrounding me doesn't help, I've also never been told these prophecies at all so I don't give a fuck.
Full moon is out that means the wolves are all being whores with each other or who they can find, long as they stay the fuck away from me I have no need to sneer at their own disgrace. Animals fucking animals that haven't learned to go above their own instincts, yeah just cos you turn in to a wolf doesn't mean you lack that human part of you. Anyway I'm off the subject so full moon and I been slinking about the shit-hole island again, I often find the pang for old friends is what drives me to the place for I wouldn't return otherwise. I met up with Savannah and Dracon, it looked like Sav was already severely hurt.
Dracon took us to the Pit to perform the ritual to make me a demon again, I was curious and afraid at the same time. He called up what appeared to be a type of Hellish dragon, then I recalled Dracon himself was intertwined with Leviathan. In that respect its no wonder I took a great liking to the demon as we both shared draconic traits in some fashion, and it wasn't til after the event I learned Dracon had taken on physical attributes of a dragon just as I do. I remember being told my angelic body would be eaten when my heart was removed, my heart is a most precious thing it has survived at least three body transplantations already. It holds my essence or did before I was turned angel, it was after I was gone from the realm the angel part of me died altogether...
I woke up in Hell chained to a wall left to starve, left alone except when Lucifer's minions came in to offer me pain. Pain here is a terrible thing for it neither satifies or causes pleasure, it is intense causing terrible agony. The same with sex though I craved it only as a last resort, I was copulated with several times to the satisfaction of his imps and not my own. Instead it left me empty, humiliated and more alone than ever. I've been down here for months suffering at my uncle's whims as punishment for stealing from him, I'm Blueray's essence while she is on the surface being an angel I'm separated from her. We were re-united when she died, our agony increased ten fold at that moment. My head sagged against my chest all hope of getting out of here gone, now whole once more I shared my pain with the part of me that had been missing.
A voice called out my name that was familiar to me on many levels, I lifted my head and the chains that bound me fell away. I was free... The voice kept on calling me so I followed it more out of curiosity than anything else, I also wanted to get away from Lucifer that terrifying uncle Janvier told me never to see. From the depths of despair I flew out of the Hell mouth itself, taking on the form of a large black dragon that dove to my heart vessel. It took me all in every drop of me then I was replaced in to a new, blank body. A body that I took over without having to fight for it and Dendra was still with me also, a body that I moulded in to my liking with my features. A brand new body, hello born again virgin... Really need to stop doing that!
Course it was after I had settled that we began upon making Sav a demon too, she protested but had little strength to do so. Dracon made a bargain with the Kali as I perceived to be one of the many names Death itself took, for Kali is a Goddess of Death and sex and is Death not one of the greatest deities that abound? Is not sex the best pleasure on Earth? Sex and death are closely related. Death and I have a strange relationship after it took me over, Lorne may have "vanquished" it and removed it from me but Death is never vanquished. The deal was struck Dracon gave Sav part of his heart that whole gesture seemed far too familar to me, then he asked me to feed her my blood which I done. I left soon after the change had been done, didn't want to see the two get in to a fight.
A short time after my initial change I returned to see the two, I asked Dracon to return my dragon headed hammer to me also known as Shadowblade. Once I had it back in my grip I did a few moves with it, it was like the weapon had never left my hand and the runes glowed brightly on the handle. We then made our way to the church, found us some angels to harress. Course one of them seems to think its a good idea to keep laughing at me, so I half crushed her under the ground leaving her shaking in her boots. The other angel got a lucky blind shot off at me, I was already sinking in to my shadow and past caring.
Savannah's side of events
Lulz of the day:
Jules: No no you're right, you're not a pervert. You're a provert, you're really good at it!
Saturday, 28 January 2012
The tunnels
(CoLA timeline)
We were going to go to the mountains, fucking mountains! Everyone in the family was preparing to go, we had food and backpacks even first aid kits. The zombies going on a field trip to recover some sort of artifact, I was pumped as other than some large hills in Syn I had never been to some mountains before. I made sure everything was fine with Xan, cut him open put food in his stomach then seal him shut. Even set up loads of wards of defence to protect him while I was gone, I was going to be away for a long time he needed protection. My love... Wake up soon.
First we gathered at the warehouse to make sure everyone was here, Cara was running late but that gave us plenty of time to sort ourselves out. Passing around packs, kits and various other things. Once Cara showed we were on our way through the lands outside of LA, that included the Pack lands we had to traverse through. At the tunnels we re-grouped and went in, dark, dank and gloomy in there my sort of place, no sooner had we reached the inner chamber and began to search one of my wards went off.
I ran out of those tunnels fast as I could to where I keep Xan's sleeping form, the ward being triggered was a false alarm. I relaxed. Yet by the time I had gotten back to his side it was too late to go back to the tunnels, I cursed my bad luck and felt like I abandoned them. Xan is family too he's part of the AR, and he's my husband. Never before has there been a tug like this in my life, family above all others family first.
What do you do when one member of that family is not only a part of yourself, but also your lover and husband?
Lulz of the day:
[2012/02/07 13:50] Blueray Darkes: Everytime its loads of retarded questions, and then pointing out this person and that person and do I know of them. I DON'T CARE! I don't pay attention to celebraties, I don't care if they're from England, I don't care if they decided it was a good idea to dress up in a giant bunny suit with clogs on and went dancing the fucking hula on top of the world's largest satilite
We were going to go to the mountains, fucking mountains! Everyone in the family was preparing to go, we had food and backpacks even first aid kits. The zombies going on a field trip to recover some sort of artifact, I was pumped as other than some large hills in Syn I had never been to some mountains before. I made sure everything was fine with Xan, cut him open put food in his stomach then seal him shut. Even set up loads of wards of defence to protect him while I was gone, I was going to be away for a long time he needed protection. My love... Wake up soon.
First we gathered at the warehouse to make sure everyone was here, Cara was running late but that gave us plenty of time to sort ourselves out. Passing around packs, kits and various other things. Once Cara showed we were on our way through the lands outside of LA, that included the Pack lands we had to traverse through. At the tunnels we re-grouped and went in, dark, dank and gloomy in there my sort of place, no sooner had we reached the inner chamber and began to search one of my wards went off.
I ran out of those tunnels fast as I could to where I keep Xan's sleeping form, the ward being triggered was a false alarm. I relaxed. Yet by the time I had gotten back to his side it was too late to go back to the tunnels, I cursed my bad luck and felt like I abandoned them. Xan is family too he's part of the AR, and he's my husband. Never before has there been a tug like this in my life, family above all others family first.
What do you do when one member of that family is not only a part of yourself, but also your lover and husband?
Lulz of the day:
[2012/02/07 13:50] Blueray Darkes: Everytime its loads of retarded questions, and then pointing out this person and that person and do I know of them. I DON'T CARE! I don't pay attention to celebraties, I don't care if they're from England, I don't care if they decided it was a good idea to dress up in a giant bunny suit with clogs on and went dancing the fucking hula on top of the world's largest satilite
Wednesday, 4 January 2012
Strange dreams
(CoLA timeline)
When I'm not watching over Xan or hunting or even working for the AR, I tend to curl up beside my husband and sleep. My dreams are strange to me as I'm in another place, another time altogether that makes me pang for the ones I hold dear.
I'm an angel... My wings are mutilated my feelings are that I've done this myself, they keep growing back and I keep breaking them. I wasn't always an angel I was once a demon, this dream is familar to me somehow. I don't know why or how but I've been dreaming this a lot, and it just progresses along each time the dream comes to me. The first time this happened I saw Drake, then Savannah and Magpie, though everytime he shows up I get this coil of hatred, betrayal and anger towards him. Ah... The angel thing is his doing, how cruel to trap such a proud being in a body like that. Skyler won't talk to me anymore because I stink, I kill humans to
I see everything that happens, how it happens, why it happened. All I can do is watch as this isn't really me, this isn't even real its not really happened. Fuck I miss them. Days of being sick because of the change, days of wanting revenge for the hurtful condition. Time moves on I can see me standing with Savannah, I still want to grope her but we talked instead of old days. Seems anyone I meet I'm always talking about the old days...
More old faces they're now Kytara and Fraz, the pangs again even as we talked. Old days always the old days, they were wanting to rejoin the House and I still refuse. I wonder why I'm so adament on this refusal, I miss my family I miss my friends though I tortured my friends. Hehehe. Sigh...
Now I see Skyler, Asher, Dracon, Jules, Monk. People I spent time with as a family, Skyler wants back in and Asher is already there. After watching my brothers fight like toddlers I go to see Dracon, my bodyguard, my fighter, one of my own confidants. Where are the others? I didn't find Savannah or Jaco again, I saw Felice briefly before I attacked and ate some neko fingers. I don't like this dream anymore it causes me pain, I really should stop opening that door but...
I woke up and fell off the bed my face was wet with tears, I'm dead I shouldn't be able to cry anymore. I'm not just a demon anymore I'm a Risen, not the first hybrid but the first demon one. Demon zombie there's a first, I know I've been dreaming about something that's why I was crying. I sat on the floor for some time as Xan sleeps above me on the bed, eventually I drag myself up to look at him and smile. I gave up a lot to start here and gained a lot too, the laws of the Archaics are the same ones that I used to follow back in days past. Family before all others. I know I failed that law back then, don't ask me how I only just figured that out.
My heart aches though, I need to stop that. Its too human too emotional, and I don't have time to waste on that shit.
Lulz of the day:
[15:50] Fisher: they do live shoes here
[15:50] Fisher: (*shows
When I'm not watching over Xan or hunting or even working for the AR, I tend to curl up beside my husband and sleep. My dreams are strange to me as I'm in another place, another time altogether that makes me pang for the ones I hold dear.
I'm an angel... My wings are mutilated my feelings are that I've done this myself, they keep growing back and I keep breaking them. I wasn't always an angel I was once a demon, this dream is familar to me somehow. I don't know why or how but I've been dreaming this a lot, and it just progresses along each time the dream comes to me. The first time this happened I saw Drake, then Savannah and Magpie, though everytime he shows up I get this coil of hatred, betrayal and anger towards him. Ah... The angel thing is his doing, how cruel to trap such a proud being in a body like that. Skyler won't talk to me anymore because I stink, I kill humans to
I see everything that happens, how it happens, why it happened. All I can do is watch as this isn't really me, this isn't even real its not really happened. Fuck I miss them. Days of being sick because of the change, days of wanting revenge for the hurtful condition. Time moves on I can see me standing with Savannah, I still want to grope her but we talked instead of old days. Seems anyone I meet I'm always talking about the old days...
More old faces they're now Kytara and Fraz, the pangs again even as we talked. Old days always the old days, they were wanting to rejoin the House and I still refuse. I wonder why I'm so adament on this refusal, I miss my family I miss my friends though I tortured my friends. Hehehe. Sigh...
Now I see Skyler, Asher, Dracon, Jules, Monk. People I spent time with as a family, Skyler wants back in and Asher is already there. After watching my brothers fight like toddlers I go to see Dracon, my bodyguard, my fighter, one of my own confidants. Where are the others? I didn't find Savannah or Jaco again, I saw Felice briefly before I attacked and ate some neko fingers. I don't like this dream anymore it causes me pain, I really should stop opening that door but...
I woke up and fell off the bed my face was wet with tears, I'm dead I shouldn't be able to cry anymore. I'm not just a demon anymore I'm a Risen, not the first hybrid but the first demon one. Demon zombie there's a first, I know I've been dreaming about something that's why I was crying. I sat on the floor for some time as Xan sleeps above me on the bed, eventually I drag myself up to look at him and smile. I gave up a lot to start here and gained a lot too, the laws of the Archaics are the same ones that I used to follow back in days past. Family before all others. I know I failed that law back then, don't ask me how I only just figured that out.
My heart aches though, I need to stop that. Its too human too emotional, and I don't have time to waste on that shit.
Lulz of the day:
[15:50] Fisher: they do live shoes here
[15:50] Fisher: (*shows
Tuesday, 3 January 2012
The summons
(Toxian Timeline)
Jules called me to that city, the city that I mostly avoid now. Not even my monthly visits are worthy of that place, yet my family and friends are those that I left behind. Since they can't leave that island like I can.
Jules called me.
And I went.
My last visit had pulled me there to see Kytara and Fraz, I was happy to see them I really was it had been three years. We caught up on a lot of stuff that, old times that we all still shared. Today I couldn't find Jules at all at least not for a good several hours, in the meantime I pre-occupied myself watching two of my brothers mouth off at eachother. Skyler and Asher I never thought that two egos in the same place would be back, Lee a demoness I had met with Kytara and Fraz had a hard time stopping the fighting.
Skyler and me had a small disagreement about the Shadows, how the old is gone its time to start with the new. He didn't love Pieter like I did like I had used to and yes he left with us but he wants to return, I stand by my decision and by knowing I can't abide by false ones on the throne like Skyler can. Course when the current holder of the throne showed up I left, I could feel my brother Dracon near by. Jules was with me by then we caught up with both Dracon and Monk, I would have liked to go check up some of my other friends but its a matter of catching them around.
However I got distracted by a neko boy that decided to get too close, I had him flattened on his back and two fingers removed off him in almost no time at all. What? I was hungry! I told Dracon I could come back if he called for me, that would be the only reason why I'd visit at all. Fuck it even that traitorous Magpie could call for me if he wanted, I would proberly punch him in the face for the effort. Yeah friends and family can call me, if I'm there I've got a reputation to keep up. Simply put I'm free, the old values are gone. I'm not sticking around to make new ones, where's the worth in that?
Lulz of the day:
[21:29] Oliviana Firelight offers her some brown sauce with her meal
[21:32] Blueray Darkes: YOU MONSTER
[21:32] Oliviana Firelight: HAHAHAHA
[21:32] Oliviana Firelight dies laughing
Jules called me to that city, the city that I mostly avoid now. Not even my monthly visits are worthy of that place, yet my family and friends are those that I left behind. Since they can't leave that island like I can.
Jules called me.
And I went.
My last visit had pulled me there to see Kytara and Fraz, I was happy to see them I really was it had been three years. We caught up on a lot of stuff that, old times that we all still shared. Today I couldn't find Jules at all at least not for a good several hours, in the meantime I pre-occupied myself watching two of my brothers mouth off at eachother. Skyler and Asher I never thought that two egos in the same place would be back, Lee a demoness I had met with Kytara and Fraz had a hard time stopping the fighting.
Skyler and me had a small disagreement about the Shadows, how the old is gone its time to start with the new. He didn't love Pieter like I did like I had used to and yes he left with us but he wants to return, I stand by my decision and by knowing I can't abide by false ones on the throne like Skyler can. Course when the current holder of the throne showed up I left, I could feel my brother Dracon near by. Jules was with me by then we caught up with both Dracon and Monk, I would have liked to go check up some of my other friends but its a matter of catching them around.
However I got distracted by a neko boy that decided to get too close, I had him flattened on his back and two fingers removed off him in almost no time at all. What? I was hungry! I told Dracon I could come back if he called for me, that would be the only reason why I'd visit at all. Fuck it even that traitorous Magpie could call for me if he wanted, I would proberly punch him in the face for the effort. Yeah friends and family can call me, if I'm there I've got a reputation to keep up. Simply put I'm free, the old values are gone. I'm not sticking around to make new ones, where's the worth in that?
Lulz of the day:
[21:29] Oliviana Firelight offers her some brown sauce with her meal
[21:32] Blueray Darkes: YOU MONSTER
[21:32] Oliviana Firelight: HAHAHAHA
[21:32] Oliviana Firelight dies laughing
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